A participant who always knows best

The context

At a meeting some participants cause irritation by insisting that they are always right and by trying to convince others that they are wrong.

The problem

Participants who take over, speaking as if they are right and everybody else is wrong create tension or apathy (withdrawal) amongst those who are subjected to this kind of behaviour.

Why is this a problem?

A conversation that is characterised by a fixed attitude that there is right and wrong easily polarises the group. When a group is split into an “us” and a “them”, each with their own belief that they have correct information and the “right” way of acting there is a significant risk that the conversation gets stuck.

The resulting tension in the room inhibits the conversation and limits its quality.

Withdrawal and apathy by participants also affect the conversation adversely and limits the aim of including all the perspectives – particularly if an important perspective is held by somebody who withdraws due to irritation or to the fact that they feel intimidated.

What you can do as facilitator

Your task as facilitator is partly to counteract fragmentation in the group and create an atmosphere characterised by openness and clarity. There are some concrete tools you could use to achieve this and to enhance flow in the conversation.

• In the first place you could mirror back what the person is saying. They might realise that they are being arrogant and correct themselves.
• Secondly, you could ask a question such as: “Why is this important for you?” Or you could check the person’s assumptions with a question such as: “You seem very certain of what you are saying. What is your view based upon?”
• Thirdly, you could address the whole group and ask whether everybody is in agreement or whether there are alternative views. Give space for the alternative views and allow them to explain their assumptions or the deeper feelings, values or beliefs that their views are based upon.

If there are contradictory views and there is disagreement about whose facts are correct, you could suggest joint fact finding before the next meeting.